Writer Neurosis…inevitable…dose of reality…purely journaling

This morning my horrorscope advised me not to begin new projects but to complete the ones underway.  We don’t put a lot of stock in the stars in my household, but I reflected on this one for awhile…jotting the following in my journal:

Projects piling up

pages and pages in manuscript

–          all of them –

 

my work sustains

only immaterial parts of myself –

Nothing, else

 

so stacks

and stacks

and stacks

of papers filled by pens

notebooks, journals, folders full

 

a wife, seven children

a house, utilities

a car, a yard, fuel

food, shelter, clothing

activities

 

no way to insure

no bartering fodder

just thought

and effort

and art

and thousands of books read, to read

 

what are these values?

what is my “system”?

beliefs?

 

I see a photograph

–          it becomes words

I view a painting

–          becomes words

hear music and speech

–          becomes text

feel emotions, bodies

–          become language

taste food or drink

–          and write

hope, dream, surmise

–          and write

read, learn, look & listen

–          for words

“as if the language itself could take us where it will never go”

-Ron Loewinsohn-

p.s. unfortunately,  I seem inherently averse to “submission” in any form… L  alas