“All discourses…would then develop in the anonymity of a murmur…
What difference does it make who is speaking?”
“We talk only because of a persistent desire to understand what is it we are saying”
“Again and again there is the attempt to define the world in language and to display it –
but that doesn’t work”
According to a receipt yellowed in the pages of The Impossible book, 16 years ago I purchased the Story of Rats by Georges Bataille.
“What are you ‘getting at’?”
“What do you mean by ‘kernel’?”
Questions are asked. I ask them myself.
Today I got bored of it.
Uncertain I ‘get at’ anything. Doubtful even that ‘I’. Yet “feel” pursuit of some ‘kernel.’ In other words, because, simply, ‘other words’ (fore-words, afterwords) sometimes eventuate communication…
…as if experience were an undifferentiable ocean of moving waves – incalculably deep waters ever in motion – unstoppable, interminable, immersive, and overwhelming – and something splashes, a cup dips, a boat prow plows its way, an arm drops, or rock, or bird flashes down talons – and a surface becomes, is broken…
…ruin. Ruined. Inalterably (no, that’s not accurate – rather incessantly alterable, altering, altar-ing, alterity – othered and changed) altered, altared – SACRIFICED to perception, experience – peering-in-out-of, or peering/prying-out-of-in, out-of-pry-into
Rue-in, is what ‘I’ seem to do. Bring sorrow, lack, and loss with each perception, each calling, each again/comparison/re-cognition…Ruin, rue-in. Touching, seeing, tasting, smelling, hearing – continual selection and ignor-ance (DE-selection, de-lectory, de-clamation, di-visory…) rues-in, sorrows-in, i-dentifies creating lack, erasure, damage.
“What happens – ?”
The temptation together [to gather]…to peer and pry into, in, with…to test and to try…to extract and bring, to-gather… to form-u-late. AFTER experience, to create other…posit(-ion) a “You,” “out,” exo-, ex-tend, ex-plain, ex-haust, ex-hilerate and ex-aspirate…to KILL, CRUSH, SLICE, DIFFERENTIATE…’I’ hiding somewhere in All and Every.
An ‘I’ in All is AIL. Rue-in.
“Wouldn’t it be better if we didn’t get sick? But we do.” – Jan Zwicky
“Don’t be so hard on yourself…we all…”
Separate, tear, disjoint, di-chotomize, di-vulge, de-story, de-struct [de-con-struct i-we-form de-form]
As I was saying, try-pry-di-ing to say…
“Who? When? Where? How?”
Tri-, di-, all in-volves, in-volutes, con-volutes a cutting, a ripping, a be-lying of de-struction – as it crafts an alternate structure (con-struction)…
Oui. We. Yes. The sense that Is the sense of being-thrown, dropped, something making a splash, separating the waters… a kerneling, an ob-ject (re-ject, ab-ject) dis-turbance that sub-jects turbulence…
Thrown. Splash. Change. Alteration. Altaration. Altarity. Othering. For-IN (foreign)… kernel.
“What are you ‘getting at’?”
“So that’s what you mean by ‘kernel’? Dis-turbance… Turbulence… something must be… in order to…”
“What thing? Why?”
“In the beginning was the Word… was God… and God moved…and divided the waters…” (John 1:1, Genesis 1:1, 6, KJV) a Bar, a “firmament,” a permanent Between “called Heaven.” And so separating, separation be-gins…from the first very first motion, movement, change… ex-pulsion, ex-crement, ex-ultation, ex-is-stance. Out. OUT. OUT-of… posit-ion.
“You’ve lost me…”
“Oui – what are you ‘getting at’?”
Ex-perience. Prying, peering. Trying. Be-ing separates? Dis-joins? Dis-tracts? ‘I’ am a rupture. Dis-rupts: not two, not one. I stray, strive, volition, volute…de-story, de-volve. What am ‘I’ but a weapon-blade? Rue-in. And thus I speak, say with pointed pen…poke and pry and terrorize – ex-perience.
“Glorious or gory-ous – visions are di-visions”
So it seems…
“So it is…”
Is, was, will be spoken into/out-of our stance (existance)…falsified di-visions…
“I cannot get beyond language by means of language”