for Friday Fictioneers – 21 June 2013
As long as nobody moves. Scenario accomplished. Sky filled with blues. Reflected in waters, reassembled by lines – manufactured / emergent. The breath would come. Optionally. A reality could be structured with less than this. Hold still. In the beginning – world. Populous, variegated, intricate with potential. A setting of pebbles and mimes. Activities at the ready. Engine set to whirl. As long as nobody moves. Nobody says. Nobody breathes. Still-pointed swirl. Anticipation. The drawing of the sneeze. A trickling toward itch. Hummingbird-eyelid. A sudden rush of wind. Transgress.
10 thoughts on “”
Neat portrait of stillness before action. My favorite image in here has got to be “The drawing of the sneeze.” The anticipation of what’s to come.
Good capturing of the look and feel of the prompt. Fine take!
Brilliant, Nathan! I especially like “intricate with potential” and “hummingbird eyelid.” I was just thinking about the idea of potential energy in science while driving to work this morning…(seriously! ~in the way that it could be applied to one’s creative life…) This scenario really does embody that idea of waiting with bated breath to see what potential action will develop. You are so good at capturing the essence of images.
I really had the feeling of being on the edge, on the cusp of motion while yet waiting, a static motion waiting to become real.
Intriguing response to the prompt. The instant before the starting gun goes off, before the director shouts “Action!” Some great phrases – The drawing of the sneeze! I can feel one coming on now 🙂
“Activities at the ready” is my favorite line. You painted the scene with vivid words.
Great tension… the sunshine the guard become suddenly much more threatening with your words.