I really don’t know what these things are I’ve been writing (“Ideas of Home”, this one…). Seem to be open ramblings. I apologize if they waste time for any readers, I think I’m trying to open up channels inside of me with less self-conscious shaping and imposition of some pre-formed concepts of style, order, characterization, plot, even poesy. Opening veins, trying to allow swollen connections between pockets of my body and brain that otherwise occur only in dreams or infrequently heightened states. Not sure what’s going on, just writing.
In the Depression, A Cavern
The outlook that prides its common sense (for those who bear it)
“I cannot comprehend our attachments to beings”
Airtight logic. Closed circle of belief.
The end is doom and oblivion, i.e. “end.”
Therefore, “I cannot comprehend attachment” –
to things? Well, perhaps, for personal endurance, a comfort while still understanding their nature (“truth”: “things fall apart, the center cannot hold”)
that all become, belong to silence (no total comprehension, understanding) all is constant change, therefore ephemeral, ridiculous to trust or develop dependence – everything changes, and then you die…
that, well that does not seem to alter much. Perhaps it wavers.
As all things wobble and waver, are insecure, uncertain.
Well, but maybe not “ends” and “loss” – almost certain, almost absolutely so,
but then not everything has happened, as far as we know.
Hold on to joy’s illusions – real experiences – and why not?
You better let go
or it will be taken, suffocated, crushed.
Smile, but don’t forget to cry, there are many truths.
And much matter(s) to perceive (momentarily)
But then there’s that: the individuality of perception
and the fact that that capacity will cease.
Heightened moments, erasing duration,
fictions of time and space.
Self and other.